Sexual Partners ·
Telling sexual contacts, whether they’re casual or regular partners, can be difficult, as you don’t know how they might react. With casual partners you may decide there’s no reason to disclose as long as you always have safer sex. If your objective in telling a casual shag is to get emotional support, be aware that this is unlikely. You also need to consider the harsh fact that some folk like to gossip and you may not want your one-nighter telling everyone in the pub the next day.
Telling becomes more important if the relationship is developing into something deeper that you hope will be lasting. Most guys feel it’s important to be honest within long-term relationships and it can be stressful to keep your status a secret when you’re emotionally involved with someone. Most people who have told a prospective partner report that the sooner it’s said, the easier and better, so you know where you stand.
My business or theirs?
- Can you trust him?
- Is the sex you’re having putting him at risk?
- Can you cope with the possibility of rejection?
- Do you know his HIV status?
Test the water
- You can never predict exactly how someone is going to react when you disclose your HIV status, so it is always a good idea to test the water beforehand.
- Bring HIV into the conversation and see how he or she reacts – but remember you might not get the response you would like. Someone who’s very negative about people with HIV in general may not be when they realise it’s their friend who’s positive.
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